Bittersweet(Love's Paradox)

what i feel for you
cannot easily be explained
its like a cold sunshine
and a cloudless rain
i love you always
but i hate you to
no scratch that i hate
some of the things that you do
its like when im around you
my world lights up
you love me for me
and its pure never rushed
but its how you really feel
it comes from the soul
but where that love is
something bad flows
its that uncontrolable fear
that not wanting to lose
but in reality your not gaining much to
i mean if you dont know by now
imma always be here
and its nothing that can make me
change how i feel,
but although you make me complete
you leave me empty
cause when you leave
so does all the promises you give me
and im honestly going crazy
dont quite know what to do
in my heart i feel a hole
cause you left me open
so now im bleeding for you
and with the blood comes the tears
dripping into my soul
and stinging me from within
but with the sting
is a little solitude
cause i know in the end
you will fix that to
i know when you hold me
that we have something real
i know when you kiss me
that my home is near
its crazy how i sit here
praying, hoping, wishing
results that once seemed clear
are now confused
i need an intermention
for my life cause where its headed
im afraid to do the show
baby im tired of the acting
i dont want to play no more
but im happy when im with you
i feel a sense of peace
and i know that this is long
but my heart just wont stop its release
until you come and repair the damage
for you alone it will beat.
so many memories and so many last
the tears i cry are for the good and the bad
when i look at you i see my forever
when im anywhere near you
my future seems bright
what im feeling is unbelievable
immposible to most
but the emotions are as real
as light and dark
im right at the entrance
standing in the door frame
searching for the light switch
so that the darkness in the next room
is no more
fighting this battle that i know i can win
and seeking eternity
in a gamble but confident imma win
i cant promise you a friendship
cause our hearts have promised more
thats why we just cant part
even when we tell each other to go
and deep down we dont want to part
were both lost confused
but the only differnce is
in the end i would choose you
but im not going to rest on your decsion
cause i know that your not sure
i mean i guess ive just grown a lot
and you have a little ways to go
so i end this asking this one little thing
dont push mylove away
cause all of my concern and care
is what makes my heart your resting place
and you dont want to leave it
and that i do really know
you just need to believe
so im trying not to go
you have had a hard time
and i know it
and i just wont back away
i wont let you struggle
and i wont cause you pain
but now all i am saying
is that you cant go that far
deal with on your own go ahead
but dont punish me by taking back your heart
cause i have done nothing wrong
all ive done is cherish you
and i cant be your friend
but ill never leave you....